The Last Sensitive Cowboy

When you hear that i'm a cowboy, and i work the cattle trail.

You probably assume i'm big and tough (big and tough)

But the trail's worn me down, i don't want to hang around

I've just about had enough (had enough)

you see i like a nice cup of expresso,

and i like to read my people magazine

I co-ordinate my chaps, but everybody laughs

and say they don't like that shade of green

Chorus:

Oh no, it's true, i'm a sensitive cowboy and i don't know what to do

oh no, it's kinda strange, i'm the last sensitive cowboy on the range

well i try to eat a healthy, balanced diet

but they all eat their brown beans from the can

They all have to smoke about six packs a day

you'd think they was the marlboro man (*cough* smooth!)

and they don't like to go to see the opera

on friday nights when they get paid

and they don't help me bring in the hanging plants

every time there's a native american raid

Chorus

(Spoken)

Cowboy life sure is different these days

why brand your cattle when you can just use bovine psychology?

why have a gun fight when there are so many good para-legals out there?

Nobody drinks and bush-whacks anymore

And besides, we're all switching over to eating salt-reduced tofu jerky

And if you're gonna ride off into the sunset,

make sure you're using an effective sun-block

Chorus (x2)