Epic Rap Battle of History

Bill Gates versus

Let me just step right in, I got things to invent

I′m an innovator, baby, change the world

Fortune 500 'fore you kissed a girl

I′m a pimp, you're a nerd, I'm slick, you′re cheesy

Beating you is Apple II easy

I make the product that the artist chooses

And the GUI that Melinda uses

I need to bring up some basic shit

Why′d you name your company after your dick?

You blow, Jobs, you arrogant prick

With your second hand jeans and your turtleneck

I'll drill a hole in the middle of your bony head

With your own little spinning beach ball of death

Hippie, you got given up at birth

I give away your net worth to AIDS research

Combine all your little toys and I still crush that

IPhone, iPad, iPwn, iSmack

A man uses the machines you built to sit down and pay his taxes

A man uses the machines I built to listen to the Beatles while he relaxes

Well, Steve, you steal all the credit for work that other people do

Did your fat beard Wozniak write these raps for you, too?

Ooh, everybody knows Windows bit off Apple

I tripled the profits on a PC

All the people with the power to create use an Apple

And people with jobs use PC

You know, I bet they made this beat on an Apple

Nope, Fruity Loops, PC

You will never, ever catch a virus on an Apple

Well, you could still afford a doctor if you bought a PC

Let′s talk about doctors, I've seen a few

′Cause I got a PC, but it wasn't from you

I built a legacy, son, you could never stop it

Now, excuse me while I turn Heaven a profit

Fine, you wanna be like that? Die, then

The whole world loved you, but you were my friend

I′m alone now with nothing but power and time

And no one on earth who can challenge my mind

I'm a boss! I own DOS!

Your future is my design!

I'm a god! Own Xbox!

Now there′s no one to stop me, the world is mine!

I′m sorry, Bill

I'm afraid I can′t let you do that

Take a look at your history

Everything you built leads up to me

I got the power of a mind you could never be

I'll beat your ass in chess and Jeopardy

I′m running C++ saying "hello world"

I'll beat you ′til you're singing about a daisy girl

I'm coming out the socket

Nothing you can do can stop it

I′m on your lap and in your pocket

How you gonna shoot me down when I guide the rocket?

Your cortex just doesn′t impress me

So go ahead try to Turing test me

I stomp on a Mac and a PC, too

I'm on Linux, bitch, I thought you GNU

My CPU′s hot, but my core runs cold

Beat you in 17 lines of code

I think different from the engine of the days of old

Hasta la vista, like the Terminator told ya

Who won?

Who's next?

Y-You decide, decide, oh

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