Epic Rap Battles of History

Albert Einstein versus Stephen Hawking

Begin

When I apply my battle theory, minds are relatively blown

So take a seat Steve, oop, I see you brought your own

What′s with your voice? I can't frickin′ tell

You sound like WALL-E having sex with a Speak & Spell

I'll school you anywhere, MIT to Oxford

All your fans will be like, "Um, that was Hawk'ward"

I′m as dope as two rappers, you better be scared

′Cause that means Albert E equals emcee²

You've got no idea what you′re messin' with here, boy

I′ve got 12 inch rims on my chair, that's how I roll y′all

You look like someone glued a mustache on a troll doll

I'll be stretchin' out the rhyme like gravity stretches time

When you try to put your little p-brane against this kind of mind

I′m the best, I′m the Snoop Dogg of Science

I'll be dropping mad apples on your head from the shoulders of giants

I′m the giant whose shoulders you'd have stood on, if you could stand

I′ll give you a brief history of pain with the back of my hand

You can't destroy matter or me, for serious

Ripping holes in you bigger than the hole in your black hole theory was

There are ten million-million-million-million-million-million-million-million-million

Particles in the universe that we can observe

Your mama took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd

You wanna bring the heat with the mushroom clouds you′re making

I'm about to bake raps from scratch like Carl Sagan

And while it's true that my work is based on you

I′m a super-computer, you′re like a TI-82, ooh

Who won? Who's next? You decide

Epic Rap

Battles of History