The Lament Of Desmond R.g. Underwood-fredrick

Ah, the news of my impending death

Came at a really bad time for me

Yeah, the news of my impending death

Any other day might have been ok

I was starting to track with my inner guide

I was getting in touch with my feminine side

But when the doctor starts whistling "Happy Trails"

Tends to take a bit of wind out of the old sails

chorus:

Desi Ray, if I may be so blunt

Galahad, bag your agnostic front

Underwood, hire a good undertaker

Freddie, get ready to meet your maker

Ah, the news of my impending death

Came at a really bad time for me

I was far too young to depreciate

When they read me my expiration date

I'd built Iron Man stalls in the northern wild

I'd played Cabbage Patch dolls with my inner child

Now I'm getting sealed bids for a granite vault

And I'm pretty sure this is my parents' fault

(chorus)

Ah, the news of my impending death

Came at a really bad time for me

When they cancel your breathing policy

Tends to steal a bit of the old joie de vivre

I'd just found the lost key to my mythic life

So I bravely shook free of my kids and wife

I had seminars booked as a second career

Until a still, small voice screamed loud and clear

(chorus)