I Couldn't Be a Billionaire So I Voted Like One Instead

Meet your plastic robot man
Your gullible, proud garbage can
Stretch me like a rubber bandI′ll snap back into place

I've got something that you need
Financial insecurity
A sense that it′s not stopping me
From punching my own face

And all my friends are laughing but they're gonna eat their words
Cause I'm gonna be a millionaire someday

I′ll blame my friends for all my pain
Piss in my mouth and I′ll taste rain
My mailman robbed me blind again
Employee of the week

Sometimes my old mailman fails
And gets himself caught up in jail
You know I'll gladly pay his bail
Cause soon I′ll be the thief

And all my family's laughing but they′re gonna eat their words
Cause I'm gonna be a billionaire someday

Special interests, focus groups
Raise your voice, support the troops
Keeping up just ain′t no use
It starts to sound the same

I just wanna close the door
Pretend things ain't so bad no more
One thing that I know for sure
The mailman ain't to blame

And all the world is laughing but they′re gonna eat their words
Cause I′m gonna be a trillionaire someday