Fruitcakes

You know, I was talking to my friend Desdemoda the other day. She runs the space station and bait shop down near Boomtown. she told me that human beings were flawed individuals. That the cosmic baker took us out of the oven a little too early. That's why we're all so crazy. And I believe it. Take for example when your go to the movies anymore. They try to sell you this big jumbo-sized drink. That's eight extra ounces of watered-down Cherry Coke for twenty-five cents, I don't want it. I don't want that much organization in my life. I don't want other people thinking for me! I want my Junior Mints! Where did Junior Mints go at the movies? I don't want a twelve pound Nesley Crunch for twenty-five dollars! I want Junior Mints! We need more fruitcakes in this world! Less bakers! We need people that care! I'm made as hell! And I don't wanna take it anymore!

Fruitcakes in the kitchen

Fruitcakes on the street

Struttin' naked through the cross-walk

In the middle of the week

Half-baked cookies in the oven

Half-baked people on the bus

There's a little bit of fruitcake

Left in every one of us

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Paradise! Lost and found

Paradise! Take a look around

I was out in California

Where I hear they have it all

They got riots, fires, and mudslides

They got sushi in the mall

Water bars, Brontonsaurs

Chinese modern lust

Shake and bake life with a quake

The secret's in the crust

Speakin' of fruitcakes, how 'bout the government?

Your tax dollars at work

We lost our Martian rocket ship

The high paid spokesman said

Looks like that silly rocket ship

Has lost it's cone shaped head

We spent ninety jillion dollars

Trying to get a look at Mars

I hear universal laughter

Ringing out among the stars

Fruitcakes in the galaxy

Fruitcakes on the earth

Struttin' naked towards eternity

We've been that way since birth

Half-baked cookies in the oven

Half-baked people on the bus

Ther