Everyone knows Jesus

The man who healed the lame.

But I am Jesus' brother

Craig is my name.

Jesus is the Prince of Peace.

Jesus is the Lamb.

Jesus is the Son of God

But Craig don't give a damn.

Cuz when Craig's in sight

We'll party all damn night.

I don't turn water into wine

But into cold Coors Light.

I'm not my brother, I know,

Don't walk on H2O

But I got hydroponic shit that me and Judas grow.

I'm fuckin Craig

I'm fuckin Craig

I'm fuckin Craig

Craig Christ

I hang out with Lepers,

Barabas and Salome.

Jesus' friends are called Apostles.

Those dudes are totally gay.

Jesus performs miracles

From Galilee to Rome.

But it would be a miracle

If he brought a fuckin lady home.

Because when Jesus is prayin

Fuckin Craig is layin

Every lady in the Testament

You know what im sayin?

I won't die for your sins

Like my famous kin.

But if you have a little sister

Then theres room at this inn.

I'm fuckin Craig.

I'm fuckin Craig.

I'm fuckin Craig.

Craig Christ.

Jesus was our mothers fav.

All her love to him she gave.

But there's no sibling rivalry

When he's nailed to that tree.

Yeah.

And now the question for you

Is not "What Would Jesus Do?"

But where will you be

When the Craig Machine comes partyin through?

And if the Lord will allow

You've got to ask yourself how,

and who and why and when and where is your messiah now?

It's fuckin Craig.

Fuckin Craig.

Fuckin Craig.

I'm fuckin Craig.

Craig Christ.

Craig Christ.

Craig Christ.

I'm fuckin Craig.