Mistress said "I love you Chris"

Can't stand to see you kill yourself like this

He's talking on the car phone

From the driveway of his own home

Chris is running from the FBI

He's been indicted as a foreign spy

He tells her on his car phone

He thinks they're both alone

Talking, talking

Talking, talking, talking on the car phone

I stole a million fake Nintendo chips

But never let it cross your lips

That I told you on the car phone

Or they'll write it on my gravestone

I'm gonna help you get that acting job

Got you a lawyer from the mob

He tells her on his car phone

Sends a shiver up her backbone

Chorus

And if there's anyone in space

What they'll learn about the human race

Will be from listening to us

Talking on the car phone

Hitman dials a secret code

Receiver in the trunk explodes

As he calls him on his car phone

Orange flames across the center line

You can see it on the news at nine

He really got his mind blown

And if there's anyone in space

What they'll learn about the human race

Will be from listening to us

Talking on the car phone