Tell me what you like, I'll print it all

You need laughs, 'cause you don't need misery

Just tell me what you need, I'll tell it all

Screw the facts, I can give you fantasy

Chorus:

My magazine, I'm talking about my magazine...

Just tell me what you want, I print it all

You need help, it's a sick society

Just tell me what you need, I sell it all

Who needs friends, I'm collecting enemies

Repeat Chorus