Let me tell a story 'bout a boy named Brian

This is not a fairy tale, no, that's not what I'm implyin'

This is really not the type rhyme, writing 'bout flexin'

Got some bitches on the phone but I'm really not replyin' type shit

With the clique, and we going out to get ourselves a drink

To the fast lane, might make the pedal fuckin' sink

Bumpin' Lil Wayne, feelin' like we ain't got time to think

Cigarettes, feelin' like we be the kings, got to the party 'bout 11:28

Went up to the bartender askin' for some Bombay

No mixer, straight up, so you know I'm gettin' wasted

Then I realized I ain't even bring my paper

Might notice [?] see him, losin' like I'm Charlie Sheen

We can let them wait, panickin' 'cause now my glass is clean

Talkin' to the bartender, "Sorry sir, I'm just a teen"

That's when I finally met the girl of my fuckin' dreams

Ain't no game that I play when it comes to

Gettin' that kitty out the cage for my night, go

Drive to store just to buy a fuckin' mattress

If that can mean she gon' end up on my nitrous

Back to the story and now I'm talkin' to this girl

I'ma call her Tracy and she lookin' like dessert

She noticin' that I'm trussin', then she asked me, "What for?"

And I told her everything, and she gave me three fours

She said, "Where you wanna go?" and I told her, "I don't know"

"Do you got a girlfriend? That don't really matter, though"

I'm like, "Oh shit," thinkin' 'bout where this gonna go

So I proceed, man's never did this shit before, aye

Back to her place now, tryna get my thing up

2 AM, whiskey dick, 80% discount

So I had to go down, cruisin' down to poon town

Making sure I put that bitch's frown on upside-down

Gettin' pretty wet, sweat runnin' down her neck

And the kitty so cute, I wanna keep it as a pet

She so clean, man, that pussy smell like honeydew zest

Finally gettin' hard, so you know what's finna happen next

Ain't no game that I play when it comes to

Gettin' that kitty out the cage for my night, go

Drive to store just to buy a fuckin' mattress

If that can mean she gon' end up on my nitrous

Strugglin' to put the Jimmy on, turnin' red, I feel like a million

Then she gettin' on top and your boy just start to feel hysteria

"Bump and Grind" playin' in the stereo when I told her, "It's my first time"

And she told me, "Baby, it's fine, I don't mind"

Then she held my hand and it was intertwined

My god, it was nothin' like what I had in my mind

Now it's time to put it in, baby, now it's primetime

This is where the fun begun

Heard her moan and I'm feeling like I'm 'bout to fuckin' cum

Heard a knock, now your boy's got to go and fuckin' run

Then I made a jump, heard the loudest scream ever

It was from her fuckin' mom, aye

Called Mike on the team, said I need to leave the scene

He done picked me up, told him 'bout the girl that did the deed

Even said her name, then he asked if he could take a peek

Jumped out his fuckin' seat, turns out I fucked his sis