[Intro: Eminem]

I don't know, dude

I think everybody's all jealous and shit

'Cause I'm, like, the lead singer of the band, dude

And I think everybody's got a fucking problem with me, dude

And they need to take it up with me after the show

Because

[Chorus 1: Eminem]

These chicks don't even know the

Name of my band

But they're all on me like they

Wanna hold hands

'Cause once I blow, they know

That I'll be the man

All because I'm the lead

Singer of my band

[Verse 1: Eminem]

So I get off stage, right? Drop the mic

Walk up to these hot chicks, and I'm all like:

"Sup, ladies? My name's Slim Shady

I'm the lead singer of D12, baby"

They're all like, "Oh my God, it's him

Becky, oh my fucking God, it's Eminem

I swear to fucking God, dude, you fucking rock

Please, Marshall, please, let me suck your cock"

Now by now, the rest of the fellas get jealous

Especially when I drop the beat and do my acapellas

All the chicks start yelling, all the hot babes

Throw their bras and their shirts and their panties on stage

So, like every single night, they pick a fight with me

But when we fight, it's kinda like sibling rivalry

'Cause they're back on stage the next night with me

Dude, I just think they're tryna steal the light from me

Yesterday, Kuniva tried to pull a knife on me

'Cause I told him Jessica Alba's my wife-to-be

This rock star shit is the life for me

And all the other guys just despise me because these

[Chorus 1: Eminem]

These chicks don't even know the

Name of my band

But they're all on me like they

Wanna hold hands

'Cause once I blow, they know

That I'll be the man

All because I'm the lead

Singer of my band

[Post-Chorus 1: Eminem & Swifty McVay]

My band, my band

My band, my band

My band, my band

My band, my band

My band

Alright, okay, alright

Baby, yeah, give me that mic, man

Okay, dawg, give—come on, man! Dude!

Give me this mic! Ow, dude!

[Verse 2: Swifty McVay & Kon Artis]

You just wanna see a nigga backwards, don't you? (Uh-huh)

ADAT? How come we don't rap on Pro Tools? (God dang)

Smash these vocals and do a performance

But we in the van (Uh-huh) and he in a tour bus (Ha)

You don't want my autograph, you's a liar

And nah, I'm Swift, "Oh, I thought you were Kuniva" (Come on!)

And what the hell is wrong with our dressing room?

'Cause our shit is looking smaller than a decimal

See, I know how to rap (Uh-huh) it's simple, but

All I did was read a Russell Simmons book (Yeah)

So I'm more intact, tryna get on the map

Doing jumping jacks while getting whipped on my back

[Verse 3: Kuniva, Kon Artis & Eminem]

Look at Em, little punk ass, thinking he the shit

Yeah, I know, man, by himself, taking all the flicks

Ayy, I thought we had an interview with DJ Clue?

No, I had an interview, not you two

You gon' be late for soundcheck! Man, I ain't going to soundcheck

And our mics are screwed up! And his always sound best

You know what, man? I'ma say somethin'

Ayo, Em! You got somethin' to say?! Man, nuttin'

I thought you was about to tell him off, man, wassup?

Man, I'ma tell him when I feel like it, man, shut up

And you ain't even back me up, and we supposed to be crew

Man, I was about to talk right after you, I swear

Aww, man, whatever! I swear, man!

[Chorus 1: Eminem]

These chicks don't even know the

Name of my band

But they're all on me like they

Wanna hold hands

'Cause once I blow, they know

That I'll be the man

All because I'm the lead

Singer of my band

[Verse 4: Proof, Eminem & Kon Artis]

They say the lead singers rock, but the group does not

Went from sold-out arenas to amusement parks

How I'm gon' let the world know that Proof is hot?

I should cut his mic off when the music starts

(Ayo, wh—) Ready to snap on a dumbass fan

Every time I hear, "Hey, dude, I love your band!"

We ain't a band, bitch, we don't play instruments

So why he get ninety, and we only get ten percent?

And these guys acting funny every area code

Proof, carry my bag! Bitch, carry your own

Can't make it to the stage, security in my way

Who the fuck are you? Where's Obie and Dre?

[Verse 5: Bizarre]

God damn it, I'm sick of this group (Fuck D12)

Time for me to go solo and make some loot (Yeah)

I told you I made the beats and wrote all the raps

'Til Kon Artis slipped me some crack (Take this)

"Lose Yourself" video, I was in the back

"Superman" video, uh, I was in the back (Hahaha)

Fuck the media, I got some suggestions

Fuck Marshall, ask us some questions

Like, "Who is D12?" "How we get started?"

(But what about Eminem?) Bitch, are you retarded?

Anyway, I'm the popularest guy in the group

Big-ass stomach, bitches think I'm cute (Hey sexy!)

50 told me to do sit-ups to get buff

Did two and a half and couldn't get up

Fuck D12, I'm outta this band

I'm 'bout to start a group with The Real Roxanne

[Bridge: Eminem, Bizarre, Bizarre & Eminem]

Girl, why can't you (Roxanne, Roxanne)

See you're the (Bizarre will be your man)

Only one for me?

And it just

Tears my ass apart

To know that

You don't know my

Name! Man, fuck this

[Chorus 2: Bizarre]

These chicks don't even know the

Name of my band (Haha)

But they're all on me like they

Wanna hold hands (Fuck Marshall)

'Cause once I blow, I know that

I'll be the man (Yeah)

All because I'm the new slim...

*Blends* *Laughs*

[Post-Chorus 2: Eminem & Bizarre]

My band, my band (Your band)

My band, my band (Our band, your band)

My band, my band (You man, you man)

My band, my band (Roxanne Shanté)

My band (Lesbian)

Yeah, ayo

The hardest boy band in the world

D12!

[Outro: Eminem]

I'm the lead singer of my band

I get all the girls to take off their underpants

I'm the lead singer of my band

My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance

My salsa, woah, woah

Look out for my next single, it's called

"My Salsa"

My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, my salsa

My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance

And take off their underpants

My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance

And take off their underpants

My salsa

Where'd everybody go?...