Yo, mic check

Testing one, two, um... twelve

My favorite color is red, like the blood shed

From Kurt Cobain's head when he shot himself dead

Women all grabbin' at my shishkabob

Bought Lauryn Hill's tape so her kids could starve

You thought I was livid, now I'm even more so

Shit I got full blown AIDS and a sore throat

I got a wardrobe with an orange robe

I'm in the fourth row, signin' autographs until my show

I just remembered that I'm absent minded

Wait, I mean I've lost my mind I can't find it

I freestylin' every verse that I spit

Cuz I don't even remember the words to my shit

I told the doc that I need a change in sickness

I gave a girl herpes in exchange for syphilis

Put my LP on your Christmas wish list

You wanna get high, here bitch just sniff this

Come on everybody, get down tonight (8X)

I tried suicide once and I'll try it again

That's why I write songs where I die at the end

Cuz I don't give a fuck, like my middle finger was stuck

And I was waving it at everybody screamin' "I suck"

I go on stage in front of a sellout crowd

And yell out loud "All of y'all get the hell out now"

Fuck rap, I'm givin' it up y'all, I'm Sorry

(But Eminem this is your record release party!)

I'm bored out of my gord

So I took a hammer and nailed my foot the the floorboard of my Ford

I guess I'm just a sick, sick bastard

Just one sandwich short of a picnic basket

One Excederin tablet short of a full medicine cabinet

Fell like my head has been shredded like lettuce and cabbage

And if you ever see a video for this shit

I'll probably be dressed up like a mummy with my wrists slit

Come on everybody, get down tonight (8X)

Got bitches on my jock out in East Detroit

Cause they think that I'm a motherfuckin Beastie Boy

So I told em I was Mike D, It was like (gee I don't know, he might be!)

I told em, "Meet me at Kid Rock's next concert

I'll be standin by the Loch Ness monster, peace out"

Then I jetted to the weed house

Smoked out till I started bustin freestyles

Broke out then I dipped quick back to the crib, put on lipstick

Crushed up the Tylenol then ate it with a dipstick

Made a couple of crank calls collect

"Ken Kaniff from Connecticut, can you accept?"

I wanna make songs all the fellas dub

And murder every rich rapper that I'm jealous of

So just remember when I bomb your set

Yo, I only cuss to make your mom upset

Come on everybody get down tonight (16X)