With so much going on isn′t it time for you to crack

Under all this pressure people keep placing upon your back

Kuz I know you're starting to stress worried about an attackOf panic starting to occur kuz you know you can′t finish jack

I'm working as hard as I can, just give me some time

I have so much piling up I'm slowly trying to climb

I know I shouldn′t have waited I′ve been knocked out of my prime

But I gotta keep focused and try to stay on the grind

Give it a break, you're almost an adult and what do have to show

You′ve kept your nose in books for so long, your childhood is letting go

You're a burnt out gifted kid whos screwing up what was bestowed upon you

And now dont know where the hell in life you′ll follow

Yeah I've spent most of my time studying rather than enjoying

Spending time with friends which on the inside is destroying me

Kuz I want to succeed and hopefully try avoiding

Failing at what I do and prove I′m not disappointing

Have you taken a hard look at yourself it's a little late for that

Seriously, nothing stands out about you you just fall flat

No one would give you the time of day, you're just ignoring the facts

That anyone could do better than you I mean haven′t you thought of that

Why don′t you give it a rest, I've been trying to look fitter

I′m training all the time and I've been trying to get quicker

I know I′ll never be the best looking but it doesn't leave me bitter

I just want it to be enough for a girl to consider

Hate to tell you but _______ will never give you the honor

Of taking them out or to even be bothered

To think of you two as anything more than two friends

Just keep your mouth shut kuz you′ll make things awkward

As longs as she's in my life I couldn't really care less

I won′t tell her how I feel, keep my emotions suppressed

Maybe someday I′ll be enough to finally impress her

And eventually I'll be lucky enough to find some success

Aren′t you always talking about how much you just wanna end it

With the way everything's looking I actually recommend it

But don′t look in the mirror thinking your conscience will prevent it

But its not like you'll grow a pair and actually attempt it

Shut up, I was ready for it with a switchblade in my grip

That night I was a wreck my mind really began to slip

Thinking about where would be the best place to start to rip

Kuz all I wanted was to have a swift one way trip

And isolation didn′t help when I needed comfort from others

I really needed someone to turn to when I began to uncover

Feelings towards myself that I never wanted discovered

And I spent all that time wishing that I didn't have to suffer

Kuz I felt like me as a person was never really good enough,

I always managed to take something good and screw it up

Repeated being told that I no longer wanted to hear it from anyone

That feeling of disappointment and stupidity hurt in the long run

But sadly your still here, it was obvious you couldn't follow through

Should′ve done it when you had the chance kuz nobody would miss you

You owe an explanation, like your stay here, it′s overdue

I thought about so much that night, if you only knew

I didn't want my family to come wake me and find me soaked

While I lay there motionless because of what I provoked

Upon myself, they′d be in pain questioning it and would've hoped

That it was a twisted dream from which they hopefully awoke

If you did it, your quote friends wouldn′t have given a damn about what happened

You're probably right but I didn′t want to give them the satisfaction

Of knowing that I took their words to heart and this was my reaction

Plus there'd be idiots highlighting my death for the attraction

Well no matter what you're still just a disappointment

In everyone′s eyes you can see their discontentment

I′m through listening to you, I should've just avoided it

I wish I could get rid of you but I guess I have to accept it

Constantly contradicting

Always in my mind, thoughts are spinning

My conscious repeatedly afflicting

So much damage that just keeps getting

Worse as it keeps constricting

Myself from peacefully existing

While this fight im currently facing

Rages on and each side is resisting

I don′t know where this internal struggle will be taking me

As I try to call for help but can't release my aching pleas

Because my conscience is continuously berating me

Trying to tear me apart ultimately betraying me

I can′t look in the mirror without staring at my antagonist

That I've created through self hatred over time by accident

Now my life′s dictated by a feeling of being inadequate

I'm so infuriated that my conscience is a dark catalyst

By clouding up my focus and converting any splendor

That life once held, turning me into a pretender

Since I lost motivation I'm no longer a contender

I don′t want this no more, I give up, I surrender...

I surrender

Damn