Look, they say the universe, it works in a strange way

And it must be true because we ain′t from

The same background or same placeBut me and Lesley ended up on theat same train

I'm talkin′ every day

I used to wake up around seven or eight

To catch the 9:06 to Norbury station

Two different worlds in the same location

One day we ended up speaking

And I would talk about college

She would talk about meetings

And how she's plannin' on leavin′

How she hates what she does

But she needs it

I asked her what she would do

When it′s the weekend

But she said, she said

"I don't know myself

I don′t know myself no more"

She used to be the life of the party for true

But now she goin' out hardly ever

Her man got her in the yard forever

And her friends wanna help

But it′s hard to tell her

Hard to let her know that

Her man's possessive and aggressive

And she can′t even see it

But for them it's clear as day

She's in a situation

Her friend Hannah had a man that was manipulative

So she can see it from a mile off

Turtle-neck jumpers, make-up around the eye spots

All the signs were there

But Leslie made it seem a light affair

Said it wasn′t right to share

Her boyfriend he was a mystery man

I didn′t know much about him

But he's been in the can

Name′s Jason, he's a bad boy with no reasonin′

To be honest, I don't know what Les sees in him

′Cause she's a good girl with a sweet heart

But they both got demons in the deep past

You know opposites attract, apparently

Never heard her talk about her family ever, uh-uh

He was all that she had

Until they had an argument

And he stopped callin' her back

And I don′t know if there was

More to the story than that

′Cause she plays things down

But according to that

He went missing one day

In the morning, he ran

She's doin′ over-time

Struggling affordin' a flat

′Til she lost her job

It fucked all of her plans

Couldn't pay the rent

Borrowin′ and callin' for cash

But Hannah, she was there for her

Cared for her

When I saw Les, she told me

"I don't know myself

I don′t know myself no more"

Les sayin′ "I got nothin' to live for

It′s been raw but, David,

I ain't ever been this poor

There′s no income

My boyfriend left me

So how the fuck am I gonna

Survive when this kid's born?"

And I said, "It′s a blessing, as mad as it is

And, Les, I never even

Knew that you were havin' a kid"

Bro, she's four months pregnant

Young and neglected

Single, but I don′t think

She wants to accept it

So she′s still textin' exes

Tryna get this back on track

But I don′t think that she gets it

It's emotional obsession

Clinical depression

Life is a lesson

And you ain′t gotta sit and cry

'Cause Lesley, livin′ in this gift called life

There's no better gift than the gift of life

So, can you handle it?"

"I don't know myself

I don′t know myself no more"

But that changed here perspective

Late in December

Her baby′s expected to drop

She's accepted, excited, electric, pumped

Only gotta wait a few months

Her and Hannah had lunch

Told her she′s pregnant

And they're the closest of bredren

So she didn′t stop to tell her

I think that's it′s an error

You ain't a mum for a day

You're a mum forever

Whatever, and you and

Jason break up whenever

If I′m honest, that′s something

You shoulda done together

She doesn't know that her and

Jason goin′ out again

And Jason doesn't know that

Lesley′s carrying a child for them

She had daydreams of settlin' down with Jason

Better ′cause now they're together it's wild

Feelin′ like she needs to call her friends and tell ′em

'Cause, while she′s lettin' ′em down

But most of them are never around

She calls Hannah the next day

Still tryna figure out the best way to tell her

That she's gettin′ back together with her ex flame

So she left her a voicemail

Like "Yo, Hannah, it's Les

Can you call me back?

I wanna talk about the baby

You, me, Jason, all of that

I been feelin' like

I need to get my aura back

I used to be so fuckin′ confident

But these days, I swear that

I don′t know myself

I don't know myself no more"

It′s 3:30

Lesley was meant to get a scan

But today I think she's goin′ home early

Tryna talk to Jason, tell him 'bout the kid

Addressing any reservations

Have that conversation

Middle of the summer and it′s rainin'

Waitin' at the train station

Hella cancellations, so she gets a taxi

Sittin′ in the back seat

Blue jean jacket and a maxi

Actually tired and her legs are achin′

Touched her destination

Way faster that the cab driver's estimation

She put the key in the door

She couldn′t believe

What she see on the floor

Some size-five trainers

Ragin', tears in her eyes, but it′s cool

'Cause they must be the neighbour′s

And Jason's in the bedroom, fully naked

Lesley's runnin′ up the stairs

But she′s makin' noise

And she can hear Jason′s voice sayin'

"Hide in the closet"

But he′s made his choice

So she bursts in

Sayin', "What kind of person

Would cheat on his pregnant girlfriend?"

Jason sayin′, "What the fuck?

You're pregnant?

What the fuck?

You weren't even gonna tell me

I mean, what the fuck

What d′you want from us?

Nah, you ain′t in love

You just wanna love

Lesley tellin' Jason,"I don′t wanna love

I don't want a you-and-I, I don′t want a us

And also, I don't wanna talk loads

One more line, before

I dash like Morse code

Open the wardrobe"

And Jason′s on the edge

"I just wanna see if she was prettier than me

Slimmer than me

Maybe your baby's similar to me

Maybe you wanted someone thicker than me

Fitter than me

To satisfy you quicker than me

I got your baby in my stomach

And you did this to me

What did I ever do to you

For you to finish with me?

I didn't believe my girls

But they were thinkin′ of me

And give it to me,

The wardrobe, give me the key"

I was pullin′ at the door

But Jason's bigger than me

Literally, I remember viscerally

Jason pullin′ from behind me

Now he's grippin′ on me

White flashes, eye gashes

When he's hittin′ me, see

I just wanted to disappear

I wasn't livin' for me

Physically, I shut the fuckin′ doors

Quick as could be

He′s outside, askin' why

I made him do what he did

Using a kick to open up the room that I′m in

I'm feelin′ afraid, barricaded

With a chair in the handle

I'm hearin′ sirens

I just wanna run away, but I can't

Jason's gone by the time

Police have come and they saw that there

Ain′t no one else in the house

The feds are runnin′ through the door, shoutin'

"We have reports of an argument with a woman"

There′s blood all over the floor

And it's splattered onto the wall

Lesley′s on the bed and she's tryna speak to the feds

She′s deep in the stress

And there's metres above her head

If anything she couldn't even say anything

But she′s got this really sharp pain where her belly is

So they call an ambulance

Lesley even had planned for this

Police are in the room tryna

Find the missing piece of the puzzle

Until they stumble on somethin′ that's kinda random

It′s a phone, in the wardrobe

It had five missed calls from Jason

And also a couple other numbers

So they're thinkin′ that it's no help

Until they play the voicemail

Like "Yo, Hannah, it′s Les

Can you call me back?

I wanna talk about the baby

You, me, Jason, all of that

I been feelin' like I need to get my aura back

I used to be so fuckin' confident

But these days, I swear that

I don′t know myself

I don′t know myself no more"

She felt sick to her stomach, she started panickin'

Mind rattlin′, tryna understand what Hannah did

Battlin' the shame ′cause the situation embarrassin'

Tryna fathom it, betrayed by her own garrison

Meanwhile, she′s on the deck

Tryna manage this piercing

Pain in her stomach

She couldn't handle it

Now she's waiting for an ambulance

Look, and I know she′s strong

But when I heard about

What happened I was over-shocked

Her nose was gone

Her jawline shattered and rot

They said her baby was

The reason she was holdin′ on

She's dozing off

Doctors gettin′ no response

Her heart rate's slowin′ down

And they don't know what′s wrong

Picked her up, got her out of the home

And on to the stretcher for good measure

But she's fading out, uh

She took damage to the brain

And now she's in a coma as we speak

But I ain′t sure if she can make it out

You see, this time that

I′m takin' out to tell you the story

Is more that a song or track

It′s a message to a woman with a toxic man

I'm beggin′ you to get support

If you're lost or trapped

I understand that I can never under-stand

And I ain′t sayin' that it's easy but it must be right

Some of your sisters, aunties

Mums or wives are fucked inside

And they won′t ever touch on why

I′m touched, 'cause I′ve seen

Women that are loved or liked

Cry a little red tear through a bloodshot eye

This shit's awful

No matter what culture, it ain′t normal

Men try and twist it and make it seem like it's your fault

In that train full of people that you′re takin'

How many Lesley's are runnin′ from their Jasons?

Angel without wings

Like the day without the night

To bring her peace

A song without a voice

A spark without a flame

A child without a name

Oh it′s just wrong

Like an ocean without a shore

A soldier without a war

How can we do this anymore?

A song without a voice

A spark without a flame

A child without a name

Oh it's just wrong

Well, we′ve made a massive amount

Of progress in this last year, haven't we?

Feels like a long journey

And I must say it′s been a pleasure

To watch you mature and grow

In thought and in your career and life

You've opened up immensely

I′d be lying if I said I wouldn't miss these sessions

But you know, you can never stop learning about yourself

So you're always welcome

I′m just happy you′re at a place now

Where you feel you understand your emotions

And are in control